Saturday, October 1, 2011

This is very strange

I've really procrastinated with this one. i've debated is this a good idea, bad idea, it won't matter because no one actually reads my blog........

so this is really for me. if you're there, reading this, you're welcome along for the ride. but i am doing this one for me.

i have cancer. lung cancer, to be precise.

and in 5 days, i'm going to go have surgery, and they're going to remove a lobe of my lung, in the hopes that they will remove all the cancer.

i don't know if i'll be having chemotherapy or not. at this moment, if it is offered, i'm inclined to go through it - if there's even 1 cancer cell that is there, and isn't dead, i could go through this again and again.

and i'm scared.

it's all pretty surreal.... i actually feel as fine as i ever do....... i look the same, feel the same, gained some weight that does not make me happy......

and then they tell me i have cancer.

it's all so weird.

so if anyone is reading this? quit smoking. quit today. i quit 20 days ago, 2 days after they diagnosed me.

oh, and one more thing?

just breathe


Eva said...

Oh. my. God.

I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm not a religious person, but I'm praying for you, because if prayer works at all, I'm hoping it does some good here. Thinking of you and wish I could be there could make you a cuppa tea and cake.

(McLovin on Ravelry)

kathy said...

I am sending huge hugs and prayers and good thoughts your way.

Please keep good and positive is so important to be positive.

kath1996 on Rav