For anyone who doesn't know it, I'm a knitter. I knit most of my free time. I have so much yarn, i don't think anyone could live long enough to knit it all.
i'm also on ravelry, a website for crazy knitter people like me.
on ravelry, on a forum for cancer type people, there's a young lady who was diagnosed 2 years ago with stage 4 lung cancer (the same kind i have) - she was only 30 at the time.
hers was more spread than mine is, even as of the last scans i had - she has tumors in her brain, and bones. so far, my liver, bones and brain are all clear.
her story gives me hope. when you hear stage 4, that's terminal. no, no, don't cringe at the word. living is a terminal condition. no one makes it out alive. but when they say stage 4, you know, with that bone chilling certainty, that it's out there. it's just a matter of when, how long. those are the questions we ask our doctors.
so reading her story, i have hope. while i'm stage 4, it isn't in those other areas, and that's a good thing. as of the last scan, there was enough improvement that i was not put on tamoxifen (yet).
and that gives me hope. after all, i'm not done with my knitting!